So today is my brother's birthday. He's 24... or 25... I can't really remember... I just know he's getting old. Anyways.. my brother is my best friend in the entire world. He's been there for me for so many things that I've had to go through. He used to sit outside my bedroom and talk to me FOR HOURS as I tried to go to sleep, and my parents used to yell at him to leave me alone. We argue absolutely everything even if we don't have to. We may totally agree about something, but debate it just to challenge the other person's opinion or argument. I miss that a lot. He's one of the funniest people I know. He's always cracking jokes and not the stupid kind either. He's genuinely clever and hilarious.He can also memorize entire movies after watching them once. So, whenever you say something, there's a chance he has a movie quote to go along with it. He's one of the smartest people I've met, and one of the sweetest and most generous. He's my best friend and I miss him so much, but I really want to embarrass him a little.
So let's tell some stories:
One time, my brother wanted advice on how to ask a girl on a date. Our conversation went something like this...
Tyler: Hey, how would you want to be asked on a date?
Me: I don't know... like. "Hey do you wanna go on a date?" "sure!"
Tyler: No, like in a creative way. Wouldn't you want it to be creative?
Me: I really just don't care.
Tyler: Well.. what would you want to do on a date? Like a date that would stand out to you?
Me: Idk... something fun?
Tyler: but like what?!!!
Me: I don't know... I just really don't care!!!
Tyler: THIS IS WHY I CAN'T ASK YOU FOR ADVICE!!! YOU AREN'T NORMAL!!! YOU AREN'T A REAL GIRL!! YOU'RE MY SISTER!
(A few days later)
Tyler: Hey Tanisha, what would you want to do on a date?
Me: WHY DO YOU ASK IF I'M NOT EVEN A REAL GIRL!!!!
Yep. I'll never let him live that one down. What does that even mean? I'm not a real girl?!
Ah.. here's another one. My brother and I used to get in fights a lot. Not real fights... just play fights because we'd debate about almost anything (even if we agreed about it) and he'd outsmart me so I would resort to hitting him. Then we'd end up in some awkward fight where he's holding my wrists so I can't hit him and I'm trying to kick him in the shins. Well, one time this was happening, and we went to knee each other at the exact same time and ended up kneeing each other's knees. I can't even describe to you what it feels like to knee someone else in the knee. It's one of the most painful and shocking things that could ever happen to you. I just remember one minute we were fighting, we kneed each other, and then the next minute we were both on the ground half-crying, half-laughing. I think we were in that state for a good 10 or 15 minutes... Good times.
Now I have a ton more stories that I could tell, but I think I'll choose to publicly announce the times that he took advantage of my idolization of him (and also my gullible nature) when we were younger. Let's start with the Hello Kitty pen. One year for Christmas, I was trying to figure out what my brother had gotten me because he just kept telling me how it was the most incredible present ever and I was going to die. So one day, he finally broke down and told me he had gotten me a Hello Kitty pen. I remember in my head being like WHAAAAT?! THAT'S IT?!!! So I followed him around for the next several weeks asking him ALL THE TIME if that's what it was. I even trailed my mom like a puppy dog asking if it was true, and they both told me over and over again that that was it. So, on Christmas morning, imagine my surprise when I open my present and it isn't a Hello Kitty pen. I can't even remember what the real present was... the Hello Kitty pen is just scarred in my mind. Even now it's an on-going joke. Anytime someone asks what their present is, there's a 99% chance the answer will be a Hello Kitty pen.
Okay last, but certainly not least, in fact I think he'll be quite peeved I posted this on the internet. Muahaha. The time my brother taught me about elbow grease. So. I was about 6 years old, which would make him about 10, and our little sister (who was probably close to two at the time) had colored with chalk on the wall behind our bedroom door. So, naturally, it was Tyler's and my job to clean it up. This was surprisingly really hard for my little six-year-old arms, and despite how much we scrubbed, the chalk just wouldn't come off. I'm sure I remember this a lot more dramatically than it really was because I was six, but whatever. So my mom comes into the room and tells us to use elbow grease. This was a foreign concept to me and so I asked my older, much wiser, brother what it was. He told me to rub my elbow against the wall, and the grease from your elbows would help break down the chalk and make it easier to wipe away. I was honestly amazed by elbow grease and the power of it, and we spent the rest of the time rubbing our elbows against the wall to get the chalk off. Now, this wouldn't be so bad, but I believed it wholeheartedly for WAY too long. One day. when I was twelve, my mom told me to clean the wall under the bar, but that I would have to use elbow-grease because it would be difficult. In my head I'm like, heck yeah no problem! So, I start rubbing my elbow against the wall and then wiping the nastiness away. About ten minutes pass and then I look up to see my mom staring at me from the doorway.
"What in the world are you doing?"
"Using elbow grease?"
Yeah... after she got over laughing at me, she explained what elbow grease really was, and now I will never let my brother live it down.
Well that's it.. so Happy Birthday Forrest Tyler Ross. I love you, you half-girl, half-child.
No comments:
Post a Comment