Homework and Cheeseries

So this semester I've actually done my homework around living, breathing human beings a lot more than I did last semester... because last semester living, breathing human beings were not something I hung out with much. So I realized that having strange conversations while doing homework isn't an exclusive finals week thing. This is a regular occurrence!!! So I bring to you snippets from a quaint Wednesday afternoon in which Alex was working on some French vocabulary assignment, Michaela was doing an elementary ed poster, and I was doing... whatever I was doing. Huh. I actually don't remember what I was working on at the moment. Not that that's relevant... Sorry that was a ramble. Commence conversation snippets:

Alex (while doing French); It's like they give me the example of the problem and it's like "a fruit that's round and orange" WELL THAT'S AN ORANGE. And then the real problem is "a vegetable that's long until you cut it and then it's short". WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?

(After maybe five minutes)

Alex: Oh it's a green bean. I don't know how to say green bean in french.

Michaela: Beano greeno?

Alex: ....That's spanish!!!!

Alex: I'm wrong that doesn't say fish. It's a drink. It isn't a fish. It's wine!!

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Alex: We're learning about food vocabulary in French right now and now all I want is some brie on bread! That's all I want!! So we need to find a bakery and a cheesery!

(A bit later)

Alex: No... Seriously we need to find a cheesery.

Alex: Where do you get milk? A grocery store?

Me: No no...  a milkery! And you get pasta from a pasta-ry!

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Alex: In France they love bread! They eat it with almost every meal so I'm going to fit in so well! It's fitting on the plane back home that's going to be a problem.

Michaela: Yeah by the time you get back you're going to weigh two tons!

Alex: 4000 pounds?!

Me: I've got the name for your biography. 4000 Pounds of Bread: The Story of the Two-Ton Woman!

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Alex needed to measure her computer for some reason related to French (I guess the French really care about computer width or something).

Michaela: Why do you need my ruler?

Alex: I need to measure my computer!!... Dang it! Nobody speaks in centimeters here!

Michaela (after wacking Alex with her ruler): I'M LIKE A CATHOLIC NUN

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Michaela: And usually I'm right... like 10 times out of 9... wait...

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Alex (after finishing her assignment):Can we do insanity?

Me: Yeah...After I'm done talking about steak and mashed potatoes

So. Moral of the story. We're all a little nuts and maybe a little easily distracted. I learn more and more every day that college is a very unique experience... and also.... I get a heck of a lot more done when I do homework alone!

How to Get Locked Out of Your Building in the Rain with Soap in Your Hair: An Autobiography

A Tale of Fall Semester:

I started off and ended my first semester of college in roughly the same way: getting locked out of my building. How exciting right? The first time was about three days after everyone had moved in, and I gave my room-key to Chandler while I talked to a friend and ended up locked out, banging on the windows, but nobody woke up. I ended up spending the night in a friend's car. The best part about this whole thing is that the next morning when I came back, nobody believed that I'd banged on their windows. They swore up and down that they would've woken up and come to the door. Let me tell you, they didn't.

So, fast forward four months. It's finals week. We just got finished studying at the library until 2 in the morning, and we walk outside to find that it's raining. We only had about three days left all together until some of our roommates left for missions, and there's this thing I've always wanted to do where you wash your hair in the rain. Yeah I sound like a psycho. Whate'er! I thought it was awesome! So on our way home I turned to Kelsi and told her we should wash our hair in the rain. After a little bit of convincing, I got Alex and Kelsi on board with Michaela as designated photo taker! She didn't stay designated photo taker for long though.. it turned into. "Wait.. is everyone washing their hair in the rain? Well... now I want to!"

Next thing you know, we're draped in towels with shampoo bottles in our hands traipsing out into the freezing cold rain. Anyone who saw us probably thought we'd taken a little too much NyQuil (if you know what I mean). Washing your hair in the rain is actually a lot harder than it may sound. Basically, the top part of your hair becomes a little damp and then the rest of your hair is still super dry so once you're done trying to lather, you end up with a very nice shampoo mullet. It's a good look. I tried to find solutions to the lack of moisture like sticking my head in the snow. Not only was this a stupid idea, it was a very cold idea as well.

Action shots!! 

Yeah.. not effective. Don't try this at home.

 This is the very exotic Egyptian shampooing triangle. Me washing Alex's hair who's washing mine and Kelsi's who's washing Alex's and mine while I wash Kelsi's and Alex's. Cool right?

....It was like three a.m. leave us alone.

Michaela looks pretty overjoyed, but Alex's face.... I'm beginning to wonder if she just realized that nobody brought a key out of the building...

Yeah.. that's right. We all got over the initial joy of doing something totally strange and stupid at three a.m. pretty quick. We were cold and wet and there was no way that all that shampoo was being washed out in the rain, and despite how awesome shampoo mullets look, we were all a little done. So, we decided it was time to go back inside and wash it all out in the comfort of a warm shower. We all turn to Michaela for her key because we'd had our own Council of Elrond and decided Michaela would be the key-bearer for our little excursion. But Michaela had no recollection of this, and had assumed that someone else had brought a key. Panic set in. If you need a reference as to how this looked see the picture of Alex above. 

We had two roommates asleep inside so everybody set out to bang on their windows.. except for me. I just sat back and laughed, knowing that I'd done this all before and we weren't going to be receiving any help from sleeping roommates that night. After banging on their windows and calling them half a dozen times each, everybody finally resigned to the fact that we were stuck outside. That's when I noticed the room above us (our wonderful FHE sisters) was glowing from a tv... and I could see somebody's head!!

Kelsi whipped out her phone and asked if they could come open the doors for us. When we explained what had happened we expected something along the lines of  "okay then....." or just the smile and nod while quickly backing away. However, she thought that it was so cool and explained that it was on her bucketlist. I guess we aren't that crazy after all.

So we'd made it into the building, but our apartment was still locked. Kelsi texted the RA but it was nearing 4 a.m. so our hopes of her being awake were close to none. Just as we'd resigned to washing our hair in the lobby bathroom's sink and sleeping in the activity room on the couches, our RA texted us back!! She let us in our room and gave us that "Well okay then..." reaction we'd been waiting for all night. We finally got to wash all of the shampoo out and go to bed. 

Now you'd think that after the first time I'd gotten locked out, I would've learned my lesson, but after this I knew!! Moral of the story? Maybe go to bed at a reasonable time? Rain is not a suitable substitute for a shower? How about take a lesson from Frodo ... the key is always your burden to bear!

Your Time is Not Now

It's the start of a wonderful new semester! And this semester I'm taking a class about the second half of the New Testament, starting in Acts of the Apostles. So, about once a week (I'll probably do every Sunday) I'm going to take a more serious approach and talk about the things that I've been learning that I've thought were really cool or touching.

This week I want to talk about Acts Chapter 3. In this chapter Peter and John are headed up to the temple when they come across a man who's been lame his entire life (over 40 years) who is begging outside of the temple gates. According to Jewish tradition, this man would've been considered  unclean and would've been told his entire life that his infirmity was the price for the sins of his parents. Now, when the number 40 is mentioned in the scriptures, it is often describing a period of judgement or preparation. For him, it could've been judgement in that the Jews judged his infirmity, or it could've been preparation for the miracle he would someday receive. When Peter and John got to the gates of the temple the man asked an alms of them as he would have any other person. But instead of giving him money, they had something much more valuable to give him. In Acts 3 verses 6-8 it says,
 "Then Peter said, Silver and gold have I none; but such as I have give I thee: In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth rise up and walk.
And he took him by the right hand, and lifted him up: and immediately his feet and ankle bones received strength.
And he leaping up stood, and walked, and entered with them into the temple, walking, and leaping, and praising God."

His entire life he was told that he wasn't whole or clean because of his physical infirmity. He was told that he couldn't enter the temple or receive the same blessings that other people could. However, even though he'd been told his entire life that the wrath of God fell on him, he harbored no bitterness at all towards God. He had enough faith to be healed. All this man was asking for was a piece or two of gold or silver, but instead he received one of the greatest gifts he could've ever been given. That day, legs that had never been used before, legs that would've been shriveled and weak, supported his weight as he stood and leaped and entered the temple for possibly the first time in his life. He knew of God's love for him, and praised Him. Can you imagine the piece and the joy he must have felt? I bet that it was a beautiful moment. This event alone helped convert 5,000 people to the church that day.

As I sat in class, I thought that this was a beautiful story, but then my professor brought up an interesting point that really touched me. This man was laid daily outside of the temple for most of his life. This healing event occurred only around 50 days after Christ was crucified, and how often had Christ come to the temple during the previous three years of His ministry? It's not only possible, but extremely likely that this man had watched the Savior walk past those temple gates many times before. It's even possible that when Jesus called many of the sick and lame and blind into the temple to heal them, that this man was there, watching, waiting for his time. I can see him watching the Savior pass, knowing the miracles he's performed, sitting and wondering... "When will be my time? When will I be healed?". How hard it must've been to sit back, watch, and wait with the faith that maybe, just maybe, one day it would be him.

The Savior is aware of all of us.He was aware of that lame man outside of the temple gates and his struggles. How hard it must've been for Christ to watch that man struggle and know how badly he wished to be healed. To know that this man had done no wrong to make him lame. It wasn't a curse, but simply a trial. He probably saw this man time and time again and thought to Himself... "I'm not going to heal you yet. Your time is not now. I need you to strengthen my apostle Peter, and to bring 5,000 people to My church." That statement right there brought tears to my eyes.

The past four to five months have been the hardest months I have experienced in my life. One thing after the other was thrown at me, and just as I felt like maybe I could carry the load on my shoulders, something else would be added on. I watched the people around me who were so happy and were thriving. And I just wondered why me? Why now? I can't take anymore of this! I can't keep carrying this load. I can't keep moving on like this when I'm so broken. I just can't take one more step. When will be my time?  When will this weight be lifted? When will I be healed? But now isn't my time for healing. Now is my time of preparation. When the weight is lifted, it will be amazing, and it will be in the right time for me to bless others in the process. Maybe at this moment I have to stop asking for alms, for the little things like to get through my class or to travel safely, maybe I need to stop and ask what Heavenly Father would have me do. Instead of asking for pieces of silver, ask what great healing he has in store for me. He has so much in store for all of us. Maybe all we have to do is ask.

Las Vegans in the Snow: "My car is frozen to the ground!"

+Michaela Huntsman and I are from sunny Las Vegas, Nevada. To sum up the experience we've previously had with snow, It snowed about a quarter of an inch one year and schools were closed the next day. The snow was all gone by 7 a.m. So, winter time in Provo has been an adventure to say the least.

The first time that the snow stuck to the ground, there were a lot of questions and exclamations of wonderment like "What do you even wear on your feet?!" "How long is this supposed to last?" "It must take a lot of little fluffy white things falling from the sky to make this much stuff on the ground" "Snow falls in actual snow flakes! Did you know that?! I just thought when snow fell it was in like these little puffy balls and when you got a microscope those were the crystal formations! Look at this! Snow flakes!!!"

We made a lot of new discoveries too... like when snow melts in your shoes, you're going to be miserable guaranteed, and you have to kick the snow off of your shoes BEFORE you go inside or else everything in your apartment gets wet, and when enough people walk on the snow that's just fallen, it becomes ice! Woah! Crazy right? I know! So, we spent the first two weeks walking like baby deer who had just learned to stand... slipping and falling and using our curse words like "gosh hang it!" and embarrassing ourselves..... all the time (like that's new). It seems the more we embarrassed ourselves, the more the people around us found us fantastically entertaining. I guess that's cool or whatever... 

Aww... look at us playing in the snow for the first time.

Yeah. You can sure as heck bet that this happy little party didn't last long.

 Most of the time it was more like this. Disgust... while Kelsi's just plain happy for no reason as usual.

So, about two or three weeks pass and Michaela decides it's time to move her car for the first time since the snow came, and I decide that I'm going to go help her.

Now Michaela doesn't have a snow scraper. In fact, she didn't even know what one was before she came to Provo. 

"Hey what's that guy using on is car over there?"

"Are you kidding me? That's a snow scraper! You don't know what a snow scraper is!"

Um... Hello?! We don't even know what snow is!!! We're from Vegas. People just don't get that I guess.

So anyways, we found some rubber spatulas and went out to remove the foot of snow from the top of her car. So we spend close to 30 minutes scraping snow off the hood, then the windshield, and then the top with those stupid little rubber spatulas that were like three inches long! And yes.. we did it in the wrong order. Maybe if we had started from the top of the car... and then moved to the bottom it wouldn't have taken so much time! Whatever... and just maybe if we had sucked it up and used our stinkin' arms instead of those spatulas, we would've gotten more off at a time. But hey, hindsight is 20/20 right?

So finally.. finally we get all the snow off of her car and the windshield has defrosted and the windshield wipers are no longer frozen to the glass. Then she puts the car in reverse, and we don't go anywhere. Immediately the panic sets in. Like oh crap.. what's going on?! Then Michaela says it...

"Tanisha I think my car is frozen to the ground"

Oh crap oh crap oh crap. I mean... it makes sense. My TA the other day told us that his car was frozen to the ground and he wouldn't be able to use it until spring (I realize upon further reflection that he was probably joking about this and maybe I shouldn't take everything people say so literally). So then I go outside to take a look. As she tries to accelerate backwards the tires stay in place. That must be it. She's frozen to the ground. So I come up with a solution as fast I can.... Canadians!!! Some of our friends are from Canada. They clearly know more about situations like this than we do. So, we run to enlist their help. 

We get up to their apartment and Connor (one of the Canadians), Derek, and their roommate Osvaldo agree to help us out. So they put on gloves and jackets and come outside to help us out. Meanwhile I'm just thinking about how hilarious this situation is because let's be real. Who else would this happen to but us? The snow-stupid girls from Las Vegas!  We arrive at the car and Connor says he wants to get in to see what's going on. So, he turns on the car... and turns off the emergency break. The emergency break!!! You've got to be joking!! I mean... I figured that it's only common sense to take off your emergency break so I didn't even consider that would be an issue. 

I look at Michaela and she's stunned. She can't even talk. It's all coming out like "But I always... the emergency break.... I don't... I always put it down... I can't". We say thanks for the help through their laughter at us, and get in the car to begin the drive of shame. I thought that it was absolutely hilarious. Michaela... not so much. She was embarrassed beyond belief. We figured out what happened though, and for the sake of Michaela's dignity I shall explain.

When Michaela starts her car, she puts down her parking break immediately. That day, when we got in the car, it was to turn it on and defrost the windows while we worked.. not to drive away. So, she didn't put down the parking break. Then, after working for thirty minutes in the cold, we got in the car to drive away and her instincts told her that she would've put down the parking break when she first turned the car on because she always does that.....

Anyways, she didn't. Should've checked that out before we jumped to some ridiculous conclusion. I'm just grateful we had some good friends around to help us out ya know? And I don't think they'll hold it over our heads for too long.

.....Forever isn't that long... right?

The Library Occurrences of Finals Week

Finals, as I've discovered for the first time, do really weird things to you. Suddenly all you're capable of doing is studying, or eating, or sleeping and as Kelsi put it "It's like I can care about studying or I can care about people. And right now I just can't care about people." So our social lives have consisted of us studying in close proximity to our friends.

That way it feels like we are having social interaction, but really we're all just sitting in silence staring at computer screens until someone just can't take it anymore and half of the group breaks into conversation that has absolutely no meaning or relevance because our brains are fried... then after about five to ten minutes, studying resumes. And since we study at the library and it's open until two in the morning for finals, times have gotten pretty interesting. Here's a good example of one of our meaningless conversations. I'd told Michaela to listen to the band A Silent Film because I thought she'd like them. During the middle of studying, we both look up at each other and (as I heard it) it went a lot like this. 

Michaela: "Highlight the blonde"

Me: "what? Highlight the blonde?"

Michaela: "No I like them a lot"

Me:" Oh... oh yeah okay."

*Kelsi from a couple seats down*

Kelsi: (from a couple seats down)"I'm ready to go"

Me: "Oh you wanna go home?"

Kelsi: "No I want a potato"

Me (thinking I'd heard her wrong once again): What??

Kelsi: "Yeah I want a potato."

And then we just kept studying....

A few hours later for no apparent reason

Kelsi:  I'm just so excited to eat a potato I don't understand! Why am I so excited to eat a potato?!

And now for your entertainment... More stories of the library:

At one point, we were all studying when Derek stands to leave and pulls a random stick of licorice out of his bag and throws it at Connor, then grabs another one and throws it at Michaela... and then me, then Kelsi, then Jordan. Keep in mind that this library is like dead silent, and food technically (okay not technically but still) isn't allowed, and this conversation is not happening quietly...

Then Michaela throws the licorice back at Derek and says "Derek! I don't like licorice!"

So in outrage, he throws it back at her, and a split second later he's followed by Jordan who throws his at her too, then Connor, and then I jumped on the band-wagon and threw mine at her too. So Michaela takes one and throws it on the ground (which is apparently an insult to Derek's love) because he says "Why don't you just stomp on it too!" So she does... and then puts it back on the table.

This is all not that big of a deal until their other roommate Monty comes up hours later and sees the licorice on the table. He grabbed one and I was like "Yeah have at it! We aren't eating them". So he grabs one and as he walks away and takes a bite, Michaela turns to me and says. 

"That was the one I stepped on."

... Sorry Monty...

________________________

Sometimes you'll look up from your studying and everybody is just staring at each other. So you join the party and begin to stare at everyone, and after a few minutes of silent stares, you just go back to your studying as if nothing happened at all.

________________________

Earlier today two random people got up across the library and start grapevining towards each other while a third person recorded it... only to collide straight in the middle and fall over, laughing hysterically. I would've been mad, but hey. It was like midnight. We all need a break.

________________________

Kelsi was awake for FOREVER one day and then we decided to stay at the library until 2 a.m., and this voice comes over the intercom at 1:30 to announce that it's getting close to closing and as 1:30 approaches, Kelsi just starts flipping out. She was panicking because she didn't want to be startled by the voice so she crawled on the floor in the fetal position and I was trying to comfort her and instead it turned into this huge scene where everyone was staring at us and Kelsi was on the floor saying "Stop looking at me! I don't like it when you look at me! I can't control myself! I have no control!" One guy in particular found it very amusing. I think most of us would've normally been embarrassed... but it was 1:30 in the morning

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Michaela hands me a box of wheat thins and says "Be quiet" because food isn't allowed in the library.

I reach my hand inside as carefully as I can (which is still the sound equivalent of an army of 500 men crumpling up large sheets of printer paper while talking heatedly about last night's football game or politics or whatever men talk about), and I just can't seem to grab a dang wheat thin. So the army continues to crumple for a good two minutes as Michaela shoots me dirty looks above her laptop... until I finally grab one and remove my hand (even more noisily) out of the box. Then I stick it into my mouth. Michaela and I make eye contact and CRUNCH. The chewing itself is almost as loud as the army. But I can't stop now because there's an only partially-chewed wheat thin in my mouth and I have to finish it. So I awkwardly continue chewing while looking around like "what is that noise? Oh my gosh! Who would make that much noise in the library during finals week?" Yea... I don't think I fooled anyone.

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So one time Kelsi and I were whispering at each other from a couple of feet away and Michaela kept nagging us, saying that we were way too loud and that people could hear us. But we just kept talking anyways, and she just kept getting onto us. So finally she says "Oh my gosh! Everyone can hear what you're saying! You're so annoying! Your whisper is like a normal talking voice/"

So, in order to prove her wrong... "Do you want to hear my normal talking voice?!" which said in my normal talking voice sounded a lot like very loud talking in the middle of the silent library. We got some looks... okay a lot of looks. People were definitely angry, but she stopped nagging so it was totally worth it.

________________________

After writing a paper for three hours Kelsi turns to me at one in the morning and says

"I'm starting to lose my academic tone. I'm starting to use words like... heck/"

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There are outlets on EVERYTHING in the library. Everything. I swear. So one time (while studying big surprise there)

Michaela: There are SO many outlets in here. Imagine how many there are in the entire library.

Me: We should plug hair dryers into every single one.

________________________

And sometimes it's 1:30 in the morning and you have Kelsi proofread your blogpost and she has to calm herself down so she doesn't break into hysterical laughter... Thanks Kels. You rock.

________________________

P.S. So this just happened I'm not even joking it was the funniest thing. I finish blogging and Jordan and Connor are like "Hey come over here/"
So I go over there and they have this game up where you're a narwhal in space and you point your horn at things and stab them with it, and they made Kelsi and I fight to the death by stabbing each other in the narwhal hearts.
The End.

How to Upset a Hairstylist 101

Lately I've been feeling like there's been a lot of change in my life, and I think I just decided I needed something to represent that. So I had this crazy dream that I chopped off all my hair and dyed it black. SO I DID IT. I CHOPPED OFF ALL MY HAIR AND DYED IT BLACK.

 Ha. Funny joke right? I ain't cray. But I did decide that maybe I should do something different with my hair. Most of the time I'm really sensible and normal and I don't make rash, crazy decisions... so usually cutting my own hair would've been totally out of the picture. But I think I might've gone a little bat-crap crazy the other day because I just had it in my mind that I needed to give myself bangs. Here's the thing. I got bangs when I was in seventh grade and hated them. I looked deformed. It was not a good look let me tell you, but then I guess I decided that that was now just a fantastic idea. So, as I was unpacking from the Thanksgiving holidays, I just suddenly lost it and walked into Kelsi's room to consult her.

She was doing homework on her floor when I just walked up to her and said

"Hey what do you think I'd look like with bangs?"

So after discussing how I'd look for a little while I was just like

"Alright! I'm gonna do it!"

and Kelsi said "What? You're going to do it?"

"Yeah. Right now. If I don't do it now I'll chicken out."

So I grabbed a pair of scissors from her desk and ran to the sink to cut my bangs.

Kelsi oh-so graciously took pictures of my psychoticness.

Ready for this guys?

(Awkward close-up picture of my face)

Before:

And after:

 Yeah. It definitely wasn't professional grade work. It looks pretty good for using a pair of desk scissors, but I'm pretty sure that any hair-stylist in their right mind would slap me across the face because I didn't just wait and I did it myself. So that was my insane, totally out-of-character moment of the week, but you know what? I don't regret it. Sometimes it's nice to do something a little insane. I like it. And ya know? Kelsi commented later with something like "Tanisha I'm so glad that when you get psychotic urges it isn't to do anything like murder people. It's just to cut your hair".

She's so right. Psh. It could've been so much worse!

The Laundry Cart Incident

I have this roommate named Chandler... and she likes to fight. This is Chandler. Everyone say hi, but don't make any sudden movements or anything. You'll startle her and then she'll want to fight you.

I guess I get it. I mean she grew up with four brothers so... there's that. I guess that makes sense, but seriously sometimes she just wants to fight. And there's nothing you can do about it. You just kind of sit back and pray that someone will fight her before she comes to you... because she will be fought. If someone doesn't just fight her she'll come after someone who won't fight her back and just prey on them. I feel like a lot of the time this person is me. So anyways... recently Chandler just really wanted to fight me. So she was trying to beat me up, but I just wouldn't fight back. And I kind of slunk down to the ground, but she sat on top of me. So being the genius that I am.. I decided to make a diversion. So I was like 

"Hey Chandler why don't you go get some ropes or something and then you can tie me up like a cow!!!" 

This idea (for obvious reasons) excited her to the point where she ran away at full speed to get ropes, and in desperation, I flew into Michaela and Kelsi's room and shut the door. I then proceeded to hide in my previously chosen spot (see previous post I Will Survive Hey Hey) in case murderers or scary people... or roommates with a never ceasing desire to fight... get in the apartment. So behind Michaela's clothes I went!!

Then suddenly there was a scraping on the door. Chandler was trying to unlock the door... with knives. I really don't know how that works... but it was enough to make Michaela open the door for her. Unfortunately she knows of my hiding place, so the next thing I know I'm screaming at the top of my lungs as I'm being drug out of the closet by my feet. I can honestly say that for a second I thought that I might die. This was one of the most terrifying moments of my life.  Then came the guilt-tripping.

Chandler has this persuasive power where she says something and sometimes you're just like "Wow... why didn't I see the world this way? Yes. Yes!! We must do what Chandler says!" In this instance it was kind of like

Chandler: "But Tanisha you said I could tie you up, and I just really need to practice this skill."

Me: in my head (wow.. I am the worst person ever. Look what I've done. I lied! I said she could do it and I just totally lied! I mean I guess I could do it...What's the worst that could happen.) "Yeah Chandler totally let's do it!"

Hmmph. Let me show you the worst that could happen.

Mhmm

Yup.

That's me... in a laundry cart... tied up like a cow...

Now I hate to say this... but it got worse... much worse. But let's back up for a second and see how we got to this point... with me.. tied up like a cow... inside of a laundry cart.

I was getting tied up and thinking about what a strange and somewhat hilarious situation this is when this image popped into my mind of them dropping me off at my friend's doorstep who I'd had a date with the previous night (yeah believe it or not I get dates.... occasionally... okay not really but whatever). This image is hilarious because who wouldn't be scared out of their minds to find some girl you went on a date with tied up outside your door... yeah I don't know.. my mind is a weird place. So totally 100% hypothetically I made the mistake of saying "How funny would it be if you dropped me off tied up like this outside of Talmage's apartment hahaha" 

Yeah no. That was a bad idea. Suddenly it became Chandler's goal in life to make this happen. Somehow she used her persuasive powers to convince Michaela (who is usually very reasonable I might add) that this was a fantastic idea. So then they decided that in order to make this happen they needed the laundry cart so they could wheel me around instead of dragging my body around campus. So they did it. They put me in a laundry cart, put a blanket over my head so no one would see that I was a person, and snuck me out of the dorm in the direction of the guy's dorm.

So we get to the doors and it finally occurs to Chandler that... HMMMMM maybe this isn't such a great idea. Maybe this is just really creepy and weird. So then we decide to leave... But then I have a sudden realization. They struggled putting me into the cart... now I'm at an awkward angle and if they try to lift me out on their own, there's a 95% chance my face will meet the ground tonight. So, we realize, we have to enlist the help of boys after all. 

They sneak me through the building and up to Talmage's apartment. They hid me around the corner and Michaela (at the risk of making herself look slightly insane) took on the job of looking for help. 

She knocked and his roommate Fransisco answered.

Michaela: Hi.. is Talmage there.

Fransisco: No. Sorry

Michaela: Oh well.. I just had to ask him a question so... yeah. Thanks

Fransisco: Do you want me to take a message?

Michaela: Oh no.. no it's okay

Fransisco: Do you have his number

Michaela: Yeah..

Fransisco: .. Did you try texting him... or calling him?

Michaela: Yeah... he just didn't answer...

*awkward silence as Fransisco realizes Michaela is a desperate crazy girl trying to get a hold of his roommate*

Michaela: well thanks! Bye!

Awkward... So on to the next room!!! So next they hid me in the activity room and went to the room of some guys who have been our friends since the beginning of the year. They got Jordan and Connor (who likes my blog by the way. Yeah Connor you're awesome) to come assist with removing me from the cart. After standing around and evaluating the situation for several minutes, another one of their roommates came into the room and decided that this was the prime time to make my life even more miserable. So, he carted me down the hall to the staircase saying he was going to push me down the stairs. But that wasn't enough NOOO. Then, he pushed me into the elevator alone and pushed all the buttons so that I would just sit in there and wait until someone walked in.. and saw me awkwardly tied up... But thankfully Michaela intervened and between the both of us screaming like madwomen we managed to get me back into the activity room to be removed from my predicament. 

So then Connor, Jordan, Michaela, and Chandler all tried to remove me from the cart (unsuccessfully I might add). So Hunter was just like step aside everyone and removed me from the cart single-handedly. Then, after so graciously untying me, Jordan said they were going to head back now because there were girls in their apartment that they were hanging out with. Chandler must not have fully come to her senses at this point because she ran after Jordan screaming and asking who the girls were. Then, she once again used her persuasive powers to sic Michaela on Jordan. So they're both running down the hallway trying to get into their apartment and I'm just sitting there trying to regain feeling in my arms and thinking "wow... because we didn't look creepy or crazy enough... you have to run after them.... "

But I didn't have shoes and they had to push me in the laundry cart home... So...the only logical thing to do was follow them running at top speeds through the hall. I stood back and watched as they banged against the wall and tried to pry the door open screaming "WHO'S BETTER THAN US?!!! WHO ARE THEY?!" And finally (probably after realizing we'd never go away if they didn't give in) they let us into the room. And after Chandler introduced herself... we simply walked away. That was it. She said "Hi I'm Chandler. We're in your ward. I'll see you on Sunday!"... and we walked away. All that trouble... for that. Not only that, but we definitely didn't see them on Sunday. In fact.. they probably stopped going to church out of fear that they'd actually see us on Sunday. But hey.. what can you do?

When we got home Kelsi and Alex had come home from the store (they had missed this entire fiasco) and we explained what had happened. I guess from their end... they had come home and seen the signs of struggle and noticed that it was dead silent. So after searching the apartment for Michaela and my remains, they heard screaming in the hallway and ran out to see if it was us. It wasn't. So they got to experience an awkward conversation too...

The lesson we can learn from this college experience: How about never fight your roommates? Or never EVER suggest you let them tie you up? Or never describe to them the funny pictures that pop into your head? Actually... I think all of this could be solved with a big KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT.

The End.

P.s. apparently Jordan has been reading my blog longer than Connor or something so he's sad he didn't get a shoutout so here. Jordan's cool too because he also enjoys my blog.